Advertisements

“Mommy I have to go potty!”

Ah, potty training. Is there a more wonderful thing in all the world? I think not.

My daughter Madison will be three in October. As of last week, she was still going in a diaper and I, her mother was changing her (sorry – little potty book humor for you moms out there). We tried going cold turkey to panties before, all it got me was a week of cleaning her messes off my floors, carpet and whatever toys she trailed across in her rush to tell me she was going potty. We tried bribing her. For a week she got a new play-doh item every time she went in the potty. For a week, she was perfect. Her motivation ran out as soon as the toys did.

Part of me wants to say she’s too smart for her own good. That she obviously knows it’s far easier to have Mommy (or Daddy) clean her up than to do it herself. So she’s intentionally deciding to continue with the diaper. But I know that’s just vanity – wanting to believe my child is brilliant rather than too lazy or stubborn to just go herself in the bathroom. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Madison  (I’m sure) is a genius who will one day wow the world in some amazing fashion, but that’s not WHY she isn’t potty trained yet. [Read more…]

Advertisements

A steaming serving of guilt

Today I will be returning to visit Jim. Jim is not a friend. He is not a member of my family. In fact, he doesn’t really exist.

Jim is what I call my YMCA. Actually, it’s more than that. Jim is who my YMCA is to me. I created the concept of “Jim” shortly after my son was born in December – I had the desire was to lose the baby weight, but zero desire to workout. I tried to rethink how I was viewing exercise. It dawned on me that I thought of it (as most of us do) as something I was supposed to do, not something I actually wanted to do. So, I put the following picture in my head.

Do you remember when you first met your spouse? Some of you have to think back many many years for this, but stay with me.  Think about the first few months of your relationship. How many times did you drive somewhere just to be with them for a few minutes between jobs, or school? When you were away from that person – what were you thinking of? [Read more…]

Here’s a tip

During my Easter dinner with family, I heard an astonishing story. Apparently, Oprah told her audience that in light of these economic hard times, we should all band together in a grand money saving strategy and decide only to tip 10-12%. Now, my immediate reaction to this news was horror – my sister is a waitress and I was really quite pissed off for her entire industry that a magnate like Oprah would say something so detrimental to a huge chunk of the population. I mean come on – if you can’t afford the tip, maybe you shouldn’t be eating out? [Read more…]

Would you like some milk with your Oreos?

Last night, I ate almost half a package of double stuff Oreos. It’s true. There. I said it. And I feel better now. Sort of.

It never ceases to amaze me how much I turn to food when I’m feeling totally overwhelmed. I’m not sure why I find comfort in stuffing my face, but I do. It’s really a horrible vicious cycle. I get stressed and moody over the circumstances of my life, so I eat crap that’s only going to land directly on my thighs, which only makes me more grumpy, which in turn heightens my desire for sweet, salty or fatty foods. It’s just bad. It’s also a scientific fact that I’m not the only one: [Read more…]

On Canadian road trips, Lizzy is always right

After a week stuck inside the house with the dreaded-lagumba-disease (the flu), a sometimes ornery two year old, and laundry multiplying by the day, I needed a break. My two younger sisters (Amy and Lizzy) had just the ticket – a day trip to Leavenworth. No – not the prison. The quaint Bavarian village nestled in a valley 2-ish hours away.

We attempted inviting the 4th of us sister’s along, but there was no answer to our repeated calls. Sadness. After waiting about an hour for a call back we decided to head to the grocery store for some much needed road trip sustenance and then hit the highway heading for the mountains. We’d been driving about 40 minutes when Amy decided to break out her amazing, oh so delicious looking strawberry fruit gels (looked like fancy gumdrops). She’d purchased them at the specialty fruit and nut section of the Safeway. Lizzy stated they were going to be horrific and disgusting and we were going to hate them. Nevertheless, I accepted one from Amy and then on the count of three we popped them in our mouths and started chewing. Ugh. I looked across at Amy and saw what I’m sure was a mirror of my own expression of utter revulsion. We both rolled down our windows and chucked the gooey masses out of our mouths – Lizzy laughing in the backseat the entire time. [Read more…]

%d bloggers like this: